Thursday, October 28, 2010

Texas declares war on the USA

Texas Declares War on the USA

President Barack Obama was in the Oval Office when
his telephone rang.
"Hello, President Obama” a heavily accented
southern voice said. "This is Archie, down here at
Goliad Texas , I am callin' to tell ya’ll that we
are officially declaring war on ya!"
"Well Archie," Barack replied, "This is indeed
important news!   How big is your army?"

"Right now," said Archie, after a moments
calculation "there is myself, my cousin Harold, my
next-door-neighbor Randy, and the whole Dart Team
from Hooters. That makes eight!"
Barack paused. "I must tell you Archie that I have
one million men in my army waiting to move on my

"Wow," said Archie. "I'll have at call ya back!"
Sure enough, the next day, Archie called again. "
Mr. Obama , the war is still on! We have managed to
acquire some infantry equipment!"
"And what equipment would that be Archie?" Barack
"Well sir, we have two combines, a bulldozer, and
Harry’s John Deere tractor."
President Obama sighed. "I must tell you Archie,
that I have 16,000 tanks and 14,000 armored
personnel carriers. Also I've increased my army to
one and a half million since we last spoke."
"Lord above", said Archie, "I'll be getting back to

Sure enough, Archie called again about twenty
minutes later.. " President Obama , the war is still
on! We have managed to git ourselves airborne! We up
an' modified Harolds's ultra-light with a couple of
shotguns in the cockpit, and four boys from the
Legion have joined us as well!"

Barack was silent for a minute then cleared his
throat. "I must tell you Archie that I have 10,000
bombers and 20,000 fighter planes.  My military
complex is surrounded by laser-guided,
surface-to-air missile sites. And since we last
spoke, I've increased my army to TWO MILLION!"
"Well, crap," said Archie, "l'll have ta call "yew"
back." Sure enough, Archie called again the next day. "
President Obama ! I am sorry to have to tell ya that
we have had to call off this here war."
"I'm sorry to hear that" said Barack . "Why the
sudden change of heart?"

Well, sir," said Archie, "we've all sat ourselves
down and had a long chat over a few beers, and come
to realize that there's just no way we can feed two
million prisoners.."


Wednesday, October 27, 2010

Boomer Sooner...and scene!

Tuesday, October 19, 2010

Sunday, October 17, 2010

Monday, October 4, 2010